it beats the hell out of doing laundry

Sunday, May 01, 2005

diet revelations, volume 2

BAHAHAHA! just the thought that i could still be on the diet i started back in march is fucking hilarious. so yeah, i blew it. after a coupla weeks i just couldn't do it anymore. but i think i know why:

1) the very idea that i could create my own diet is ABSURD. i basically cut out fatty stuff and tried to eat more vegetables and the like, but what was i thinking?? i'm a person who CANNOT improvise. give me a recipe, and i will follow the directions to the letter. what? you think it would taste better with a pinch of so-and-so? NO. it's NOT in the ingredients listed. you think it's done after only 10 minutes broiling, when the directions clearly state to broil for 12 minutes?? FORGET IT. so anyway, my point is i need a plan. i need instruction. i need a diet guru to tell me what to eat and when to eat it! dr. agatston, welcome to my world.

2) carbs really are evil. it pains me to say this, because god knows i love my bread and cake and pasta and potatoes, but it's true. if i'm going to lose any substantial weight, i need to quit being such a carb whore.

3) the best part about starting a diet is the inevitable gorgefest that takes place the day before said diet begins. for me, that would be today. WHEE! french toast, pizza and a whole box of bahlsen choco leibniz! did i mention that i'm pms-ing? heh.

4) starting a diet while on your period is insane, but must be possible, right?? dave has actually asked me repeatedly to not start the diet tomorrow for this very reason, but my vanity will not be swayed! it will probably be a difficult time for all the lee boys, but my need to fit into some cute warm weather clothes SOON far outweighs any possible discomfort or disharmony. i think we shall all be stronger because of this experience. heh.

so...i'll keep you posted! the first two weeks are the hardest, but i know i can do this. wish me luck.


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